I'm begging. Miss me.

I'm tired; I have a head ache

I feel we're losing everything we worked so hard to make.

I don't know what, But something changed.

I'm fed up, I feel like giving up.

I keep looking out and in,

The hollow feeling doesn't seem to be fading away,

The feelings definitely not what I had yesterday!

I'm annoyed, the feeling had changed

Like I said, I' was too tired.

To fight for us again and again

My hopes flickering like that candle in front of me,

My eyes were closing with the pain.

I'm slipping, my mind flipping,

the day just seems to on

Like nothing was wrong.

What happened to that enjoyment we once shared?

Maybe it got tired too,

who wouldn't?

It must have found someone better to woo.

My grip not so strong,

My heart desperate for anything to meet,

You might not understand,

but the little thing lacks a reason to beat.

I feel depressed tonight,

We both know why,

Yet no one's taking action

Sigh!!

I'm tired of having to ask,

Caz it’s just not me

I'm tired of changing myself,

For reasons you obviously see.

Damn my depression,

Damn my heart.

I'm fed up of the questions,

I'm fed up of being answer-less,

I'm fed up of the untold truths,

I'm fed up of the silence that have us hooked.

Gee, what am I saying?!

Wake me up sweetheart,

I'm begging.

If still not, Then I’m going.

Fall Back And Love Eventually.

There come’s a time, when everything,

Almost everything’s precious

When all that you see,

Brings only about two, two letter words,

‘US’ and ‘WE’.

That Poem you inspired me for,

That bar of delicious 5-star,

That Golden yellow field of sun-flowers,

And Ha, How could I forget,

Those beach trips in you’re car.

When all I do is think about you,

When something I don’t do, is because of you.

When the sleepy-eyed cute fights at dawn.

And later, the tongue in cheek smile,

Only about the Sarcasm

Me and you being “turned on”

*Grin*

That night I kept it all in,

That night I swore I’d never take it all out,

One might as well as eat their words,

Especially when their life starts resembling a

Heart-a-bout!!

That time, when refusing anything’s just for,

And is only to make you persuade for more,

When saying No, is just for,

And is only to make you beg for more,

All the “you’re fat, you’re fat” comments,

I act to be angry at,

That secret enjoyment,

We both very well know.

That,*oooooohh my favorite*

That time I kept saying,

“I’m going, I’m going”

Just to hear you say “Don’t”,

And then giving you a piece of paradise,

Saying “I won’t”

Things I never do start coming up,

*yes, finally getting influenced*

Eating nutella, drinking tea,

Loving Life and yesh yesh,

Saying No to MAGGI

All I can do is look out and look out more,

The more I do, the more I got confused,

*Big grin*

For Once, I don’t regret the past,

Through all the crazy things I tend to send,

Now its

“I’m lucky I’m in love with my best friend”

A Mar To remember.

My heart felt cold,

The dreaded day had come,

The atmosphere so Icy,

Now breathing wasn’t that easy.

The moments freeze up,

Air sucked out,

A blow on my head,

Sweat puddles on my eye cup.

My brain cells almost dead,

Almost. Inhale, Exhale.

My eyes locked up

And I plunged into the chilled hard ground.

Everything fades away,

Yet, those memories remain perfectly unstained.

How could it be so?

As much as I try,

Unstained they remain

Alas, I wasn’t allowed to complain.

Then came my tears,

Shocking.

For I had nothing left to cry for.

Unstrained they were,

Flowing out without mercy,

So light.

Yet so heavy.

My limp hands and legs,

If nothing, owed me freedom at least,

I had enough, I soared out free,

Away from this damned world of yours,

I wanted to pull myself away,

I had enough of me.

I almost went away,

Almost.

And Damn, I was forcefully shut down,

Try as I might, I couldn’t get away,

I was pretty much, in every way, bound to me.

Or maybe, I actually wanted to fly away,

Unbelievable as it may seem,

Maybe I really fancied getting away from me,

In to those dull colors,

At least there,

you cannot out maneuver me.

Maybe not, maybe what I wanted

Was a break, to go sit?

Somewhere I couldn’t avoid myself,

For my part, I was haunting me.

Maybe I should just,

Stop trying to figure things out,

And Kill myself.

Or.

Go sleep.

Whatever, they make the dark

More and more breath-taking.

The Sunflower.

_/\_

Either you tell the world,

Or you choose to tell no one,

It wont matter,

You see,

Whatever you do,

The real truth will remain,

With you and me.

Yes, go away,

Far from me,

Far from my grip.

I believe I held you too tight.

Not that you asked,

Not that you even wondered

Whether I’d be hurt or not,

I had to suffer for your love bite.

Justice?? No it wasn’t.

I had told you a hundred times,

That you’d let me go. And now,

I don’t know why… It just doesn’t feel right

To say “I told you so.”

You told me you wouldn’t go,

You made me believe you wouldn’t run away,

You did what I couldn’t do,

You wiped my tears when I cried

You said I wouldn’t be forlorn,

You said I was yours,

You said you wouldn’t ever have cold feet,

You lied.

What you forgot and wasted away,

Was my trust, I liked you,

But not more than I love myself.

That’s were you went wrong,

For some time I scraped along

But it wasn’t long,

Before I was once again

Strong.

I let you go,

Like sand gripped too tight,

Your wish against mine

I was smart enough to comprehend,

Everything changes with time.

An angel you were,

An angel I thought you’d remain,

But the opposite you turned out to be,

The opposite you became.

You bitched, you pained

Revolting

Proud, Arrogant, Stupid,

A creature ever so vain.

A person to hate,

A person better left alone,

A person to be ditched,

I knew it wasn’t something you wanted willed.

Yes I loathe you,

Clearly dislike you,

Obviously not in love with you,

But somehow, I still do care for you.

Forty winks forever.

Sleep gives me pleasure

Sleep gives me peace

To snooze away into the darkness

Is something sought-after.

Three pillows, one blanket

And some soft music please,

Those needs of mine,

Need only to be met till

I’d be asleep.

A misty situation,

Over-powered with dark fumes,

A white snowy bed,

And cold winds would suffice.

A drugged feeling

Intoxicated,

Pulling the covers tight around me

I close my eyes and let me be.

With swirling perfumes

Of my favorite flowers

A night sky with stars alight,

A hazy overwhelmed shiver,

I hold them pillows tight.

The night looked perfect,

Nothing could go wrong,

Dreams resemble a blank canvas,

Waiting to be painted upon..

It’s our world,

A place only for ourselves,

An unshared heaven.

OUCH! Something burned my cheek.

And now my hands,

As always,

Nightmares wake up when dreams doze off.

That sharp sear, stretched across my mind,

Like a pin pinned down inside my nails,

Blinded for a blink,

I squinted through my sluggish eyes,

That silvery night was tearing apart.

My hushed paradise

Now a wreck.

It was time to get up.

First things first.

New curtains.

Now that’s a must.

Mind Murdered For Mistake.

I make a mistake,

Hell, I do it again.

Positive side?

For every ‘wrong’ a ‘right’ you gain.

‘But’, Like always,

A big bad But,

I don’t, cause if I did,

I wouldn’t repeat the same one’s again.

That’s when everything turns around,

I carelessly do it, I slip up,

Purely scrutinizing the pain infecting them,

And of course, lapse again.

My ear’s hear,

For what rightfully is hers to hear.

New curses and old ones,

Loud and clear.

I fight my tears,

Since I have no one to fight for.

If I had,

No doubt I would have pained them,

Like always.

All over again.

I merely gaze at my victim,

Watching worry and stress,

Coil from all around,

I realize I aint the prey,

I was the seeker.

I hunt with my hungry eyes,

Mercilessly,

Trap them with my negligence,

And eat them with my Errors.

Stunned to find my mind

Blank with Nothingness.

All the while,

Staring at my dupe,

Cry with horror and terror

I remained unmoved,

The monster in me,

Must be acting upon its instincts.

Cold Love Melts Faster.

You make me want to rip you apart,

To tear you into tiny little pieces,

To throw you away into the dark

Where I’ll never have to set eyes upon you again.

I hate you.

I feel heat inside my head.

So much.

IT hurts to think.

I jump up and down,

Trying to drown the pain inside of me,

I remember daily nights, thinking,

Being with you, Must feel like,

Inside a flower. Resting.

A sweet smelling heavenly place

Lying down hushed.

Breathing in the divine scent.

And now, Blue flames

Keep scratching my already vulnerable heart.

Like long bloody nails scribbling that black black board.

Run away from you, I will.

Kick you, I will.

Harm you, I will.

Impair you, I will.

Yet! Go with you, I Gladly will.

AS much as I can loathe you,

Dislike you, Hate you,

Bitch about you and Hurt you...

Alas!! I cannot ignore you.

Some Wishes Are Best Not Granted

A wish I did not request was ‘Two great friends’

I did not know I needed them till I simply loved them

Tears they wiped and broken hearts they mended

Lucky I cherished them before my life ended.

A wish I did not regret was desiring.

Desiring to be loved by them.

Some wishes I was granted, others denied.

Yet, confusing, to them how happily and evetually I became a gem.

Then came a wish, I wish never happened.

A humiliating deed, An emabarassing story.

The purity of my innocent li’l heart blackened. Perhaps,

It was black already. I do not know. I was sorry.

I felt sad, offended and disappointed.

For I had done something I never do.

My friends were more sad, more offended and more disappointed

For they knew I did something I never tend to do.

And now, I feel most sad, most offended and most disappointed.

I cried myself to sleep saying,

I did not want to do it,I did not want to do it.

Stupid, Stupid Me.