Dazed.

Seeming like I went to the bus and walked right back,

Such beautiful days they had been,

5 days of crazy laughter,

We all were Queens.

Knowing teachers like never before,

The fragrance of care, an aura around us,

Chance of depression being very lean,

We all were Queens.

The cold mist turned us over,

Showing the probable destruction,

We stood side by side, heard and seen,

We all were Queens.

I was just guessing,

Nothing seemed real,

A twelve dozen uncontrollable teens,

We all were queens.

I'm back home now,

Everybody was.

Visions of the past remained blurred and bleak,

Who cares?

We all were queens.

Dedicated to all the still crazier human beings who were with us, who laughed along, who cried along,

They call themselves teachers,

We call them parents.

:* to every single person responsible for Success this bright. Alhamdulillah.

Pressure.

The expected torture came up from behind,

Snuggling me close,

Me, it tried to compose.

It writhed and squealed,

And my muscles it whipped,

The words lashed out for good,

My brain,

All in all, a magnet to pain.

I cried with shame,

My eyes red rimmed they were,

My heart fluttering with despair,

Gone was my aim.

To try that hard and fail so nice,

I realized I couldn’t buy victory with my cries.

I have two more chances,

Two more dances,

I couldn’t trip, I shouldn’t fall,

But it kept me awake and did not let me dream

I had a part of my life to redeem.

It called me shameless; it called me gut-less,

It called me worthless; it called me careless

It wasn’t misery, It wasn’t a disorder,

It wasn’t any obsession nor was it depression.

It was only a four letter word.

It was exams that had me chained to grief.

To try that hard and fail so nice,

I kept realizing I couldn’t buy victory with my cries.

Love, Kiss my sear,

Trust, Wipe away my tear,

Faith, be sincere,

And everybody else,

Tell me there's luck still to appear.

My wet heart struggling to beat,

My tears dry of emotion,

We were tired, all of us

Of Decameron, Boccaccio and Erasmus.

I had me to mend and for that,

I knew, I needed silence in the end.

Why Did Destiny Capture Our Shots , If Fate Had Someone Else Framed Ahead?

Brown into the flattened black,

Had it always been that black?

Had those give-always always been this cold?

That gentle look, now not even a scratch,

But instead, dim dead and bold,

The kind that’d give anyone a panic attack

My path had been defined,

My goal’s been set,

This, an unfamiliar lane...

Why so?

Why did we meet again?

If destiny did not capture our shots,

If fate had someone else pretty ahead,

Then why did you look back?

Why did I want you to look back?

Had it been you?

Or was I seeing myself?

Regret seemed too much,

Dreams were too much too,

My consciousness remained unmoved,

Like yours, mine lost in touch!

That fleeting moment,

Did we both recede?

Was that why we didn't see each other?

The wait is for next time,

Or is it going to be never?

I remember the scene,

“Black hair set against your pale skin”

 You said,

“With crimson lips,

And cheeks as brilliant as the setting sun,

The fragrance of

Fine cream and roses,

I wanted to pull your hair back,

Put it behind your ears where they belonged,

For they were obstinate and warmed your face,

Fusing into the dusty pink Brussels lace."

I blamed the wind that refused to budge,

I blamed the noises that remained adamant.

Where was that reflex action?

We were proud of; a time ago?

Where did that flutter of,

Heart to heart beats, go?

All was perfect, then why didn’t it end well?

We had a second, we had a moment,

We had a chance, we had an option,

We could change our mind,

We had our hopes far from behind.

But that just passed,

Ever so quietly,

Nothing.

That's what we loyally did.

We stood, like fools looking into forever.

Standing there,

And resumed our pathways,

As though nonentity happened.

What an endeavor.

I'm begging. Miss me.

I'm tired; I have a head ache

I feel we're losing everything we worked so hard to make.

I don't know what, But something changed.

I'm fed up, I feel like giving up.

I keep looking out and in,

The hollow feeling doesn't seem to be fading away,

The feelings definitely not what I had yesterday!

I'm annoyed, the feeling had changed

Like I said, I' was too tired.

To fight for us again and again

My hopes flickering like that candle in front of me,

My eyes were closing with the pain.

I'm slipping, my mind flipping,

the day just seems to on

Like nothing was wrong.

What happened to that enjoyment we once shared?

Maybe it got tired too,

who wouldn't?

It must have found someone better to woo.

My grip not so strong,

My heart desperate for anything to meet,

You might not understand,

but the little thing lacks a reason to beat.

I feel depressed tonight,

We both know why,

Yet no one's taking action

Sigh!!

I'm tired of having to ask,

Caz it’s just not me

I'm tired of changing myself,

For reasons you obviously see.

Damn my depression,

Damn my heart.

I'm fed up of the questions,

I'm fed up of being answer-less,

I'm fed up of the untold truths,

I'm fed up of the silence that have us hooked.

Gee, what am I saying?!

Wake me up sweetheart,

I'm begging.

If still not, Then I’m going.

Fall Back And Love Eventually.

There come’s a time, when everything,

Almost everything’s precious

When all that you see,

Brings only about two, two letter words,

‘US’ and ‘WE’.

That Poem you inspired me for,

That bar of delicious 5-star,

That Golden yellow field of sun-flowers,

And Ha, How could I forget,

Those beach trips in you’re car.

When all I do is think about you,

When something I don’t do, is because of you.

When the sleepy-eyed cute fights at dawn.

And later, the tongue in cheek smile,

Only about the Sarcasm

Me and you being “turned on”

*Grin*

That night I kept it all in,

That night I swore I’d never take it all out,

One might as well as eat their words,

Especially when their life starts resembling a

Heart-a-bout!!

That time, when refusing anything’s just for,

And is only to make you persuade for more,

When saying No, is just for,

And is only to make you beg for more,

All the “you’re fat, you’re fat” comments,

I act to be angry at,

That secret enjoyment,

We both very well know.

That,*oooooohh my favorite*

That time I kept saying,

“I’m going, I’m going”

Just to hear you say “Don’t”,

And then giving you a piece of paradise,

Saying “I won’t”

Things I never do start coming up,

*yes, finally getting influenced*

Eating nutella, drinking tea,

Loving Life and yesh yesh,

Saying No to MAGGI

All I can do is look out and look out more,

The more I do, the more I got confused,

*Big grin*

For Once, I don’t regret the past,

Through all the crazy things I tend to send,

Now its

“I’m lucky I’m in love with my best friend”

A Mar To remember.

My heart felt cold,

The dreaded day had come,

The atmosphere so Icy,

Now breathing wasn’t that easy.

The moments freeze up,

Air sucked out,

A blow on my head,

Sweat puddles on my eye cup.

My brain cells almost dead,

Almost. Inhale, Exhale.

My eyes locked up

And I plunged into the chilled hard ground.

Everything fades away,

Yet, those memories remain perfectly unstained.

How could it be so?

As much as I try,

Unstained they remain

Alas, I wasn’t allowed to complain.

Then came my tears,

Shocking.

For I had nothing left to cry for.

Unstrained they were,

Flowing out without mercy,

So light.

Yet so heavy.

My limp hands and legs,

If nothing, owed me freedom at least,

I had enough, I soared out free,

Away from this damned world of yours,

I wanted to pull myself away,

I had enough of me.

I almost went away,

Almost.

And Damn, I was forcefully shut down,

Try as I might, I couldn’t get away,

I was pretty much, in every way, bound to me.

Or maybe, I actually wanted to fly away,

Unbelievable as it may seem,

Maybe I really fancied getting away from me,

In to those dull colors,

At least there,

you cannot out maneuver me.

Maybe not, maybe what I wanted

Was a break, to go sit?

Somewhere I couldn’t avoid myself,

For my part, I was haunting me.

Maybe I should just,

Stop trying to figure things out,

And Kill myself.

Or.

Go sleep.

Whatever, they make the dark

More and more breath-taking.

The Sunflower.

_/\_

Either you tell the world,

Or you choose to tell no one,

It wont matter,

You see,

Whatever you do,

The real truth will remain,

With you and me.

Yes, go away,

Far from me,

Far from my grip.

I believe I held you too tight.

Not that you asked,

Not that you even wondered

Whether I’d be hurt or not,

I had to suffer for your love bite.

Justice?? No it wasn’t.

I had told you a hundred times,

That you’d let me go. And now,

I don’t know why… It just doesn’t feel right

To say “I told you so.”

You told me you wouldn’t go,

You made me believe you wouldn’t run away,

You did what I couldn’t do,

You wiped my tears when I cried

You said I wouldn’t be forlorn,

You said I was yours,

You said you wouldn’t ever have cold feet,

You lied.

What you forgot and wasted away,

Was my trust, I liked you,

But not more than I love myself.

That’s were you went wrong,

For some time I scraped along

But it wasn’t long,

Before I was once again

Strong.

I let you go,

Like sand gripped too tight,

Your wish against mine

I was smart enough to comprehend,

Everything changes with time.

An angel you were,

An angel I thought you’d remain,

But the opposite you turned out to be,

The opposite you became.

You bitched, you pained

Revolting

Proud, Arrogant, Stupid,

A creature ever so vain.

A person to hate,

A person better left alone,

A person to be ditched,

I knew it wasn’t something you wanted willed.

Yes I loathe you,

Clearly dislike you,

Obviously not in love with you,

But somehow, I still do care for you.